Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Go Live!

     So today is Go live day at work...a.k.a. going from paper charting to all computer charting! Yikes! They call it go live so it sounds all cool but really it's just a scam to try and get people out of hating it. So far it hasn't been so bad. Dr. Ferguson though is cracking me up walking around the unit toting his computer cart and diligently trying to put in orders himself. Wow! I never thought I'd see the day when a Dr. puts orders in himself! Crazy! The most annoying things so far, how slow the computer is running so it takes forever to chart, and the billions of people on the unit!
    On a lighter note, I was thinking that since I am in the NICU now and will have some interesting stories about crazy people, I should share the vast amount of crazy stories about crazy people I aquired in the Medical ICU. So here's the first of many...
    Just a few weeks ago I admitted a 23 year old patient coming in with heroine overdose. He was so out of it and in pain (because withdrawing/coming down from heroine is reported to be very painful) that he was yelling and screaming from the moment he came through the door. As soon as we touched him he started yelling profanities at the top of his lungs. I will not repeat word for word exactly what all he said because I'm sure you can guess. It involves many words consisting of 4 letters and especially one starting with an f. So anytime I would go into his room he would start yelling things like "Doctor, doctor help me! I need a hug. Come hug me! Would you give me a hug?" which later progressed to, "Doctor, would you make me some spaghetti? I want some spaghetti" and "I'm not supermaaaaannn!!!! I can't do this!! It f****** hurts!! I'm gonna fly above this and overcome this! I'm not supermaaaaannnn!!!" Imagine all of this at the top of his lungs! He was on the end of the unit which happened to be next to Surgical ICU and he was so loud that people from SICU were coming over to see what was going on. There was only so much I could do since he came in with an opiate overdose I couldn't give him any opiates for pain or to shut him up! He didn't have ativan ordered. It finally got to a point and had gone on long enough that we all knew he was just faking half of it for attention. I told everyone, "As long as he's not getting out of the bed, I 'm fine with letting him scream. He can scream all he wants. I already told him he's being offensive and inappropriate and the more he yells the more we will ignore him." so that's what we did, oh but man it was a long night! Around 5am the lab tech came to draw his blood and when he stuck the patient the pt. said, "You douche bag!!! You're a doooouuucchhee bagggggg!!!!" I started laughing, I couldn't hold it in, and told the tech, "that's a new one, he must think you're special!"

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